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Edward Scissorhands – May 17, 2011

Dear Sexpert: I love it when my partner uses his hands to get me off. However, his fingernails, while clean, are yellow and thick because of “fungus.” He uses some prescription stuff and some topical stuff, which he is considerate enough to wash off before we get it on. But is it safe for him to be sticking these same fingers in my pussy? Is there any way I can catch a fungus from his nails? —Little Miss Clean Muff

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Perplexed pleasure seeker – May 9, 2011
My boyfriend and I have been practicing mutual masturbation for a while now, and I just don’t experience the same feeling as when I masturbate on... more

Is bigger really better? – May 2, 2011
I have a very large boyfriend, and I’m a very small girl. Sex is never enjoyable and typically leaves me very uncomfortable the day after. I’ve... more

And so on, and so on…. – April 25, 2011
A friend had sex with another person, but the condom broke. After that, I had unprotected sex with him. I was wondering if having unprotected sex... more

Desperately seeking orgasm – April 19, 2011
My girlfriend has never had an orgasm, and every time I think we’re close, she makes me stop because it hurts. I tried gentle oral sex, but it... more

Sweaty Sex – April 7, 2011
My boyfriend sweats profusely during sex, and after a while, it becomes a turn-off. I just can’t get past the excessive sweating. I’ve tried... more

Have you ever had that not-so-fresh feeling? – April 4, 2011
Since it’s nearly summer—and you know this Sexpert always takes the summer off—I’m thinking about making some changes... more

Fellatio failure – March 28, 2011
I just have never enjoyed giving head and I wish I did. I feel like it is the proverbial “good lay” yardstick. I really enjoy oral copulation... more

Is there a mathematical equation for this? – March 21, 2011
How much importance should sex have in a healthy relationship?—Dissecting Relationships more

Internal problem – March 14, 2011
My boyfriend and I have been together for several years and have a very satisfying sex life. However, there is one thing that has always seemed... more

Oops, I did it again! – March 7, 2011
When my wife and I are having sex and I get ready to ejaculate, I always fall out of her. What can I do about this? more

How to be safe? – February 28, 2011
I am in a committed relationship that involves various amounts of oral and vaginal sex. Given that we are monogamous, to what level should I be... more

Porn-a-palooza! – February 22, 2011
Oops! My roommate and I are best friends, but she just caught me watching porn. Is there a way to smooth over that? more

International infection – February 14, 2011
I’m dating a man from Ghana and I’m worried and wondering if I should get tested for HIV. I’m also worried that I might offend him by asking him... more

Gas attack – February 7, 2011
Certain positions during sex seem to pump air into my vagina, which causes an embarrassing noise when it comes out. Is there any way to prevent... more

Dam(n) right! – December 20, 2010
Does anyone ever really use a dental dam? more

Shelf life – December 13, 2010
Suppose I give my boyfriend a hand job, he ejaculates a little, and then I go to the bathroom; can I get pregnant? What if I wash my hands first? more

Testing the waters – December 6, 2010
I’m a gay man who has been with my partner for seven years. We have been in a perfect relationship, but over the past year he has been posting... more

Failing to excite? – November 29, 2010
I’ve been dating my girlfriend for about a month and a half now. We’ve made out really intensely—including some mutual masturbation—but she never... more

Driving on empty – November 22, 2010
Help! My sex drive has stalled. I don’t know what’s happened, but getting excited for sex is like pushing a car up a steep incline. And things... more

Starved for affection – November 15, 2010
My boyfriend of five years is suffering from a disease, and a side affect of the drugs he needs to take is a diminished libido. It is really... more

Russians, Greeks, Americans—Oh my! – November 8, 2010
I'm a 25-year-old male in a monogamous relationship. My girlfriend and I have sex about one or two times a week. If I had it my way, we’d have sex... more

Fetish finder – November 1, 2010
Recently, my girl and I decided to spruce up the bedroom. We have been talking a lot about using foods. I thought about using peaches, jolly... more

Clamp Champ – October 25, 2010
When my boyfriend masturbates or when I have sex with him, he really likes using nipple clamps. I’m kind of worried about him doing it, though.... more

Having (safe) sex! – October 18, 2010
By now, I know all the rules about having safe sex and doing it “right.” But my big question is how to get laid. Any tips? more

Honeymoon in Vegas – October 12, 2010
I got married recently, and we are going on our honeymoon. What kind of supplies do I need to bring if we are planning to get physically close... more

Information overload – October 4, 2010
I'm pretty worried. This weekend I let my boyfriend give me oral sex. He's been tested for everything and is clean. However, from doing research... more

Female ejaculator – September 23, 2010
What is “squirting” exactly? Sometimes I get abundantly flowingly wet when my man performs manual sex on me (sorry if that was too graphic). Is... more

Ninth time’s a charm? – September 20, 2010
My girlfriend and I were both virgins when we had sex for the first time three weeks ago. We've had sex seven times since then, and it still... more

Trans-plant recipients – September 13, 2010
When a woman becomes a man or a man becomes a woman, do the sexual organs work as they would on a natural-born man or woman? Are these transplant... more

She's just not that into it – September 7, 2010
So there’s this woman I used to be lovers with, and I've recently been hanging out with her again. This woman is really the only woman I have... more

Safety in numbers – May 24, 2010
Is there a safe way to have a threesome? My boyfriend would love to have another woman in bed with us, but I am not convinced that we can protect... more

Dilation temptation – May 17, 2010
My partner has just come out of a sexless marriage, and we have found that her vagina has lost some elasticity and has shrunk—is this... more

Oompa, Loompa, Doompadee-do; I’ve got another puzzle for you... – May 10, 2010
I have this ongoing fantasy about sexual relations with, well, let’s say small people. Sometimes it’s pretty vanilla, and sometimes it’s Willy... more

Pop, pop, and away – May 3, 2010
I’m gay and in a monogamous relationship. I want to use poppers with my boyfriend during sex, but he has concerns regarding their safety,... more

Hair today, hair tomorrow – April 26, 2010
I have a question about shaving. I refuse to do it. I think it’s weird to get rid of pubic hair—hairless vaginas remind me of my baby cousins! In... more

Tips of the trade – April 20, 2010
In one of your columns last fall, “Practice makes perfect,” you mention that you used to have a long list of questions you would ask potential... more

Booby trap? – April 12, 2010
My boyfriend loves to suck on my nipples. I enjoy it at least as much as he does. However, we’re both worried that this will eventually take its... more

Hard day’s night – April 5, 2010
My problem with my erection is not that I can’t have one, which would probably be more common, but that I have one way too easily. And that can be... more

Do-it-yourselfer – March 29, 2010
I am a girl with a high appetite for self-stimulation, but I don't own a vibrator (I’m too embarrassed to buy one, which is silly I know, but I... more

The 411 on phone sex – March 22, 2010
I am in a long-distance relationship, and I want to have phone sex... but I get nervous on the phone. I feel kind of silly, and I don't know what... more

Porn-nation – March 15, 2010
My boyfriend and I have been together for a year, and we are very sexually active. I just found out that he frequently masturbates to porn, and I... more

The Giving Tree – March 8, 2010
I am a giver when it comes to sex; I love giving my girlfriend an orgasm, and it really turns me on to do so. In particular, I really like to go... more

Power tools vs. hand-held models – March 1, 2010
I’m a healthy female in a long-term happy, committed relationship. I am rarely able to orgasm during oral sex though I orgasm easily and... more

When is it not enough? – February 22, 2010
For the first three months of our relationship, my boyfriend was affectionate and we frequently had sex. After that, he became completely... more

Anatomically incompatible? – February 16, 2010
Is it possible for two people to be anatomically incompatible? I lost my virginity at 19. The guy and I kept sleeping together for a while after,... more

When your fingers do the walking – February 8, 2010
How much risk do I carry if I finger a girl, and then use the same hand to touch my penis? I need an honest scientifically backed answer. Please... more

Orgasms for two, please... – February 1, 2010
I am a 22-year-old woman who masturbates frequently (I'm in a long-distance relationship). I orgasm every time during these solo sessions but am... more

Chubby chasing? – December 21, 2009
I’m a really big man, 400 pounds. I have a small penis—5 inches—and a girlfriend who claims she loves having sex with me. I make her so wet; I... more

Long-term faking – December 14, 2009
My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost four years now. We have a wonderful relationship and the sex is intimate and fun. However, like... more

Big love – December 7, 2009
I was wondering if you could give me some advice about polyamory. Many people don't know what it is, or how it works. I’m trying it now, with my... more

Close to the rim – November 30, 2009
I was wondering about the consequences of rimming. I know that there are risks of disease, but how severe are they? Thanks! more

Not in public, please – November 23, 2009
My girlfriend really likes the idea of having sex in public places. We have a hard time talking about it because she gets upset that I won’t “play... more

Rabbit replacement – November 16, 2009
My girlfriend and I are in a long-distance relationship. We had an amazing sex life before we started doing long distance, and we still have... more

Drop and give me 20! – November 9, 2009
I heard about this exercise called a “cock pushup.” Could a man actually be capable of doing this!? If so, how many should one be able to do in... more

It’s not funny! – November 2, 2009
For as long as I can remember (I’m in my 30s), I have laughed during strong orgasms. I’m talking all out, can’t stop giggling, uncontrollable,... more

Dormcest Gone Wild! – October 26, 2009
Some freshmen I live with have been talking about having an orgy. I’m not sure how I feel about this; although I'm not a virgin, the thought of... more

I’m just not that into it… – October 19, 2009
I am a 21-year-old college student. Although I have a long-term boyfriend whom I love, I find myself completely uninterested in sex. It's not just... more

A sizable problem – October 13, 2009
I frequently wonder if I am adequately sized to please my girlfriend. She says that it is not a problem, but I can't help but feel that I am... more

What happened to all those good blow jobs? – October 5, 2009
I am in a long-term relationship, committed and monogamous. Early on, my girlfriend used to give me oral sex regularly, not always to climax, but... more

Does practice make perfect? – September 28, 2009
I've only had sex, like, five times, and my stamina is not what I'd like it to be. Is this just one of those things that comes with time? Like you... more

Where the girls are – September 21, 2009
Lately I've been watching lesbian porn, but most of the time, I get really turned off, because I feel like the porn stars are acting and are... more

When bigger isn’t better – September 14, 2009
I have a frustrating problem. My girlfriend and I recently decided to take our relationship to the next level (we have been dating for a while).... more

Circumcision circumspection – May 26, 2009
I'm from the Midwest, and now that I'm surrounded by this international community here at MIT, I've just found out that circumcision is NOT... more

Ashamed of fetish – May 18, 2009
I've got a fetish. It's nothing extreme like eating feces or touching children. My fetish is so common and unobjectionable that I've heard it... more

Being affectionate – May 11, 2009
My boyfriend and I have been dating for about six months now and everything is going great except that he isn’t very affectionate with me. When we... more

It was great, but... – May 4, 2009
I have been in a relationship for a number of years, and my boyfriend and I have a very good sex life. We enjoy sex, but there's one catch: I’ve... more

Anal play – April 27, 2009
My girlfriend has asked me repeatedly to place my testicles INTO her anus while we are having vaginal intercourse. I'm open to experimentation,... more

Is piercing right for me? – April 21, 2009
When I was in undergrad, I had friends who really liked to get tattoos and piercings, because they thought it was a sensual experience. I have a... more

Know before you go (to bed, that is) – April 13, 2009
During dating, how can one raise the issue of STDs and make sure that the other person doesn't have any disease? Is there any way to verify what... more

How do I tell a new partner that I have an STD? – April 6, 2009
I contracted an STD back in high school before I got any kind of information about prevention. Since then, I have had one serious relationship,... more

Food in the bedroom – March 30, 2009
I have a friend (I swear, this is about a friend) who likes to use food during sex. She told me they like to use whipped cream and chocolate sauce... more

Sex by the numbers – March 23, 2009
I am a freshman here at MIT, and I want to ask a few questions about sex. I have not engaged in any sexual practice, and I will remain abstinent... more

How can I know for sure? – March 16, 2009
How can one know that he or she is infected with HIV? I know one can get free HIV testing, and the report is kept confidential, but are there any... more

It'll grow hair on your palms, too! – March 9, 2009
Does masturbation reduce the levels of testosterone in your body? more

Sex toy question – March 2, 2009
Somebody told me that using sex toys will make me resistant to having sex with men. She said that after I use toys for a while, men won't feel as... more

Way too early! – February 23, 2009
I'm a 21-year-old male currently attending MIT, and I am having a problem with premature ejaculation. When my girlfriend and I attempt to have... more

Porn star protection – February 17, 2009
How do porn stars prevent unwanted pregnancies? I would imagine the odds are against them even with birth control, due to the sheer number of... more

Negative and positive: Sex with HIV – February 9, 2009
What do you say about safe sex with HIV-infected person (where one partner is infected, and the other is not)? more

Oh, nuts! – February 2, 2009
I'm embarrassed to even ask this, but here goes… I'm a student, which, of course, can be quite stressful at times. When my day has been... more

Looking for the right vibe – January 26, 2009
I'm a 26-year-old woman who's never had sex. I'm interested in spicing up my, ah, solo activities with something like a small insertable vibrator.... more

Bent on getting advice – January 20, 2009
Okay, since it's been bugging me for a while, I figure now's as good a time as any to ask about penises. I know penises often have a natural tilt... more

Pulling out – January 12, 2009
I'm curious about the effectiveness of "pulling out," when combined with timing the fertility cycle. Right now, my girlfriend and I don't use any... more

Three's company? – January 5, 2009
My girlfriend recently approached me about having a three-way with another guy who's a friend of mine. I've never done anything like this before.... more

The sexpert will return... – December 19, 2008
The sexpert is away celebrating the holidays with her family; she'll be back after the New Year. Look for new questions posted weekly starting... more

Will douching prevent pregnancy? – December 15, 2008
My roommate swears to me that if you douche after having sex, you won’t get pregnant. She says she does this every time and has never gotten... more

What's the deal on female condoms? – December 8, 2008
Everyone seems to be talking about the female condom lately. Does it really work, and where can I get it? more

Do I really have to worry about HIV? – November 26, 2008
I've seen posters lately for World AIDS day. I get it: Wear a condom. I'm a straight guy. Should I really be worried about getting HIV? more

Real Answers to Real Questions

Have a question for the Sexpert? Send an email to

Kate McCarthy, M.A.
Sexual Health Specialist
Community Wellness at MIT Medical

About Sexpertise

“Sexuality is a normal and healthy part of life, and any question about it—no matter how potentially embarrassing or seemingly scandalous—is a good question.” —“Sexpert” Kate McCarthy.